mobile notes

During the past couple of months, so much has happened. I always wanted to write my thoughts here, but somehow I end up writing everything in mobile notes. These are random notes, some got deleted, some still here.



Watching a rain is so peaceful.

It's so overwhelming the way music answers all my questions.. pacifying all the storms occurring in my head.. enabling me see the beauty of little things. The so much triggering inside as if finds its answer.

How I see it is so different from how you see and yet it's just the same.

Your letting me be me is the love in its truest form.

In this moment, I have lived a zillion lives. I wish I could express.

This moment brings to me the wonder in its purest form. I don't know who I'm, why I'm but I can feel the truth of being, I can feel the love, faith, beauty. It's a wonderful moment.

Somewhere a bud is unfurling, somewhere it is.

Unknown yet familiar. Isn't it perplexing? Its in fact sweet. Sweet like sugar.

I wonder where all the things I write would go.

Sometimes I'm moved. Mostly just shaken.

I keep in my heart so much that I feel it'll come out of my eyes. I don't let it happen as I know no one will be able to differentiate between the feeling of overwhelmingness and tears. N I'll be answerless, helpless to explain this overwhelmingness.

A rain is so much more than mere droplets resulting from condensation in the water cycle. In my head, it writes thousand stories. 

This morning is different, its so different.

So what if it's not raining. Inside my head, there's already a flood.

It's not that I'm quiet these days, I'm secretive.

Sometimes it gets too much to absorb, gives you chill and shivers, the moment when you're about to witness something that you feel will be grand. You're scared of it not matching your expectations, in such moments you just feel like staying ignorant of the reality all throughout since you don't want to break the image you've in your mind regarding that.

Sometimes I'm so lost that I feel I'll never find a way back.

The best will find its way.

I'm happy while I'm traveling. Not just the holidaying type travel, any kind of travel. Traveling unfurls so much outside as well as inside. There's so much peace.

How to touch and yet stay untouched.

Wonder is -not knowing that you're so much in love and then realizing it in bits.

I don't like too much rhyming poems, something sounds weird. A poem should be free.


So I realized that I am an anti-attention seeker. I don't like people noticing me anywhichway. I want to quietly 'be'. I want to observe, feel, analyze, experience things in my own ways. I feel uncomfortable sharing myself with those who aren't close to me. I feel distracted if I cannot connect. It's not arrogance, it's myself. It's that enchantment of being an un-noted witness.  It's fulfilling. It's thrilling, it's absorbing. It's like music, which spreads throughout you and drenches you, when you've those earphones on and no one around you can see where you're treading and what you're experiencing. It's that delight of being there and yet swimming in the infinite oceans of bliss, unknown to others. It's the magic of those moments which let you just 'be' what you are, without pretenses, without the need to speak a word.

There's this road to fame and then there's this road.

It inspires me, inspires me ad infinitum, it gives me wings to fly, feet to dance, its rhythm is divine. It gives me the feel of divinity. This connect is liberation.

I want to be at the top of a mountain n the utmost bottom of an ocean.

I want to see all the exotic places on this globe. I want to be a traveller. I want to feel the motion of stars, the rhythm of rivers, the echoes of mountains, the serenity of landscapes, the chaos of forests, the vastness of deserts, the depths of oceans, the sweetness of life, the flavours of existence.

When I searched, I found nothing. When I let go the quest, I found it. I do not understand the logic.

Somehow I feel sometimes waiting is better than reaching out. It has its own pleasures.

It is as if you were sleeping for years. The initial moments of waking up. To see the world in new light, it's tough at the beginning but you're sure it's worth all effort.

There's nothing you can't learn. Absolutely nothing.

Keep trying is the only way and worth it.

A rain like this is magical. So peaceful.

I don't remember when I stopped questioning. And stopped searching. Is this all or I wanted more? 

So I'm learning, with each day, each thought, each failure, each success. Today I'm feeling okay knowing that the learning is there. I was stagnant for such a long time.

Turning pages, remembering and forgetting, drawing and erasing multiple times.. isn't this what everyone does?

When the places you've been to call you back, when once again you want to walk across those roads, amid the unknown people, hearing the  unknown languages, watching the signboards you find so difficult to read due to less proportion of vowels in the words.........


These amazing trajectories, the patterns of existence, the infinite universe which still is a conundrum, the illusion of knowledge, the puzzle of being there and yet being somewhere else too, the unsolved riddles, the unknown wistfulness, the unending search, and the serenity amid all this, overwhelms and amazes.It's not just the tune that matters, the right scale too.

Rains trigger me to write.

If at all.

So what was it that i wanted to write?

Sometimes you just need to follow your instincts and let go drilling into details.

I don't know what took me so long. So long.

Dropping verses on the way

You're the centre as well as the trajectory

Amazes me ad infinitum, this feeling of wonder.

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